Well, baby is now over 1 month old, and it’s been quite an experience so far, learning to be a mum. Some things come pretty naturally and others really, really don’t. I’ve certainly learnt a lot, so I thought I’d share some of my early lessons – hopefully they’ll be familiar to many of you and will be a reminder to me in the months to come that we’re making progress!
Is he still breathing??
I must have spent a large percentage of baby’s first night peering at his chest or checking if I could feel hot breath on my hand if I put it near his mouth and nose. I’ve kicked that habit now (mostly – still do it occasionally when he’s sleeping deeply in his pushchair or sling during a walk), but to start with I was so overwhelmed by the responsibility of protecting this little life that I needed constant reassurance that he was ok.
Netflix and cake will help to get you through the long nights
On night 1 at home I didn’t set up my “nest” well enough, and went crazy sitting beached in the nursery, unable to reach my water, my tablet, a book, etc. After that I was more careful. My nursery is now well equipped with water, snacks, entertainment (Terry Pratchett audiobooks are my go-to at the moment, having worked my way through a large proportion of Netflix), pillows and a blanket to keep me comfy and warm – everything I need to keep me relatively sane during those long nights feeding, burping, changing and cuddling my little boy, on repeat.
Routine is not feasible (yet)
Most days, just as I think I’m getting the hang of something, baby changes in some way and I’ve got to learn a new way of doing things. I can start the night shift thinking I know what I’m going to do and what will work, based on the experience of the previous night but of course, by then, it’s all changed again! Some nights he’ll go to sleep beautifully within 20 minutes of finishing his feed; other nights, he’ll need me to spend the 2 hours between feeds rocking him while I pace up and down, or dance around, or walk up and down stairs.
Nappy contents are fascinating…
… and absolutely an acceptable conversation topic with hubby over dinner. Frequency, colour, smell, explosiveness – all entirely fascinating and important things to report on when my husband gets home from work.
Baby will demand food within 2 minutes of me starting my dinner, regardless of when he last fed
This seems to be a real skill he has. And so I’ve had to start developing a skill of my own – eating with just one hand, and usually cutting up everything on my plate before I sit down to eat. Actually, most things seems to be manageable with just one hand, which is lucky as that’s all I have available most of the time now.
But mostly I’ve learnt that despite the sleep deprivation it’s genuinely tough to go for a nap rather than spending a lot of the time baby is sleeping just staring at him. And that a little prayer goes a long way – the photo with this post is of a lovely reminder a wonderful friend made for me, that through God we have the strength we need, even when it doesn’t feel like it.
So, maybe these strike a chord with you, or maybe your first month of motherhood was very different – I’d love to hear your most memorable lessons or stories from that time!
You sound so much more patient than I ever was, well done!
This all sounds very familiar! Setting up a good nest was, and continues to be very important! I think I’ve also come to learn (and mostly remember) that nothing lasts – so any bad night, or difficult phase, will end, and things will be easier on other days!
I remember only too well, checking to make sure baby was still breathing –